The dual cults of celeb worship and willful ignorance attain their apotheosis within the determine of 1 Robert James Ritchie, a.okay.a. Child Rock, a.okay.a. the longer term President of the USA of America if we actually are on the darkest timeline like Dan Harmon says. The Larry the Cable Man of butt rock is one among a handful of celebrities to throw their hats into the political ring (significantly, cease encouraging them) in latest months, and just like the red-blooded, beer bloated all-American patriot that he’s, Rock totally admits that he’s on this for the cash. And to register voters. And to spite liberals. However principally for the cash.
As Stereogum studies, Rock launched a press release on his web site saying that he’s been impressed by “neighborhood leaders, D.C. pundits, and blue-collar of us which might be simply merely uninterested in the intense left and proper bullshit“ to hawk his personal model of bullshit after Trump’s election emboldened him to announce a possible Senate run in February. That complete Senate factor remains to be TBD, however within the meantime Rock is establishing a nonprofit devoted to getting individuals who take political cues from Child Rock registered to vote, faux information about him solely doing this to promote shirts be damned.
That’s to not say this isn’t a ploy to promote shirts. It completely is— “I’ve no downside promoting Child Rock shirts and sure, I completely will use this media circus to promote/promote no matter I rattling nicely please,” he writes—nevertheless it’s not nearly that. It’s about the proper to make use of folksy aphorisms like “shattin’ of their pantaloons” to enchantment to dumbasses who put on Accomplice flag bandannas though they reside a whole lot of miles north of the Mason-Dixon line. Not that the Accomplice flag is any much less of a hate image additional south, however the Michigan factor is particularly dumb. Anyway, Rock’s full assertion is beneath.
When my title was thrown on the market for US Senate I made a decision to launch kidrockforsenate.com. I used to be past overwhelmed with the response I acquired from neighborhood leaders, D.C. pundits, and blue-collar of us which might be simply merely uninterested in the intense left and proper bullshit. As a part of the joy surrounding this doable marketing campaign, I made a decision to take a tough look to see if there was actual help for me as a candidate and my message or if it was simply because it was a contemporary new information story. The one factor I’ve seen again and again is that though persons are sad with the federal government, too few are even registered to vote or do something about it. We have now over a 12 months left till an precise election, so my first order of enterprise is to get individuals engaged and registered to vote whereas persevering with to place out my concepts on methods to assist working class individuals in Michigan and America all whereas nonetheless calling out these jackass legal professionals who name themselves politicians.
Throughout this time whereas exploring my candidacy for US Senate, I’m making a 501(c)(four) – a non-profit group for the promotion of voter registration. Not solely can I increase cash for this essential trigger, however I can assist get individuals registered to vote at my exhibits. For the reason that announcement, the media has speculated this was a ploy to promote shirts or promote one thing. I can let you know, I’ve no downside promoting Child Rock shirts and sure, I completely will use this media circus to promote/promote no matter I rattling nicely please (many different politicians are doing the identical factor, they only feed you a bunch of bullshit about it). However both means, cash raised right now via the sale of merchandise related to this very doable marketing campaign will go in the direction of our ‘register to vote’ efforts.
One factor is for positive although…The democrats are ‘shattin’ of their pantaloons’ proper now…and rightfully so!
We shall be scheduling a press convention within the subsequent 6 weeks or so to deal with this challenge amongst others, and if I determine to throw my hat within the ring for US Senate, imagine me… it’s sport on mthrfkers. — Child Rock
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